Do you ever have that feeling that you really really need a vacation? That everyone around you annoys you no matter what they do? Well, this is where I am. Combine my life being crazy and everyone driving me insane and that equals vacation. Now unfortunately I don't get to go to the Caribbean, only Amarillo, which is the furtherest thing from the Caribbean. But at least I will get to be with my family which I am really looking forward too.

I know one of the reasons that everyone is driving me crazy is that I haven't been spending enough time with the Lord. It seems that when I am spending a lot of time with God, studying and praying, then I am a nicer person and I can stand other people a lot better.

I guess the main reason I haven't been spending enough time with God is that I have been a little upset with Him. I think that God allows us to be angry with Him for a moment but then we repent and believe that what He says is true. Well, I guess I haven't done that. I go through these times when I think this whole relationship with God is just too hard and I'm not gonna work at it anymore. I'm always sorry and end up running back to Him and because He is such a wonderful God He is always there waiting for me. Why is it so hard to have the intimate relationship with Him? I don't know but I do know that it is something that I truly desire and strive to have. I need to seek Him with my whole heart all of the time and He will be there waiting for me.