Since I am not at the moment doing any kind of ART treatment, then I have absolutely no idea where I am in my cycle. I mean I know what cd it is (my homepage tells me this nifty info) but i don't know if I O'd and if I did then when. My assumption is that since I took progesterone at the end of the last cycle then I would have O'd on this cycle. If this assumption is true then I may be done with the 2ww.
Of course the only way to confirm any of this is to take the dreaded HPT. Which I just happen to have some of at home. Now what I find interesting is this the first month I can remember where I have not wanted to take a test. I think it is because I don't believe my body would do anything right on its own! So what to do, what to do???
After almost 3 years of doing this I am pretty good at not reading into symptoms. But you know how it is, with every twinge and pinch hope kinda creeps in. I have decided that if I do test it will be fmu. So it has been pretty easy to just jump out of bed and run to the bathroom before I even think about testing. I guess that is me trying to protect myself. Because you know I am going to be a mess either way. Cd 32 and counting...

So surgery went well. It was nice to be having surgery without the end result being the removal of my unborn child. But on to happier thoughts. She did remove some tissue. She didn't say it was scar tissue. But some leftovers from past pregnancies, whatever that means. So I see her again in about 10 days an then hopefully we are on to TTC again!! WooHoo so we should be back in the game at the beginning of July. It feels like it has been forever since i was pg last time. I am ready to try and hopefully be pg soon.

I slept so much. I slept a total of 18.45 hours. Woo that is a lot. But I feel really good today. Had some cramping yesterday but it is all gone and I feel 100% again.

In other news I am thinking of getting my hair cut. I have been growing it out for two years now and I think i am ready to chop it off. I know that some of my friends are gonna say no, and they may be right. I am afraid i might regret wasting two years, but it is so cute when it is short. So any thoughts???

So I went today for my SSG. It was gonna be nice and easy. Well so much for that. She tried about 3-4 times to get the catheter in and my uterus didn't want to have anything to do with it. So she went and got an HSG catheter which has a balloon on it. She was thinking that would stay in better, but alas it didn't. So then she said I want you to fill your bladder and then we will use the abdominal sono so she could see where she was going. So I drank a whole bottle of water and waited. By this time my legs were shaking so bad because they had been in the stirrups for so long. So she tries some more after I drink the water and she still cant get it. She tells me to cough and then i felt an awful pain. She was using something else to try and weave the catheter in. But no luck. So after 45 min and about 10 tries she says were are done.

She thinks maybe i have some scar tissue and that is what is keeping it from going in. So guess what, she wants to put me under and dialate my cervix. Sounds like lots of fun. I go in next friday so she can do it and she said if there is scar tissue then she can remove it then. So i am kinda hoping i do and that is what my problem is. I have to stay on the BCP until after this procedure. So not sure when af will show and I will get to start TTC again.

Oh infertility and recurrent m/c how I love thee!!!!

So things have changed at work. Joy, who worked here for almost 28 years, has retired. She will be missed (Becki stop rolling your eyes in disbelief)!!! So the dr hired a new lady and she only had 2 weeks of training. Two weeks to learn a job that someone else did for 28 years. And to add insult to injury she has never done any of this before. She doesn't do shots or mix/start IV's. Thus me not liking change. She is different than Joy, not that that is bad, but just different. She is slower, which is understandable, but it gets us way behind.

Also, since Joy is gone and the other nurse is the only one that can really answer questions we have thrown our answering machine in the trash and now Rian gets to answer all the phone calls. Woohoo, what makes this even better is that I am not at my desk all the time. I can be pulling a chart, getting a supplement out of the closet, giving a shot, finding a nurse. There are a dozen things I can be doing besides sitting at my desk!!!!!! I might have to look into a cordless headseat to get this accomplished. (if you are chatting with me and i don't seem very friendly this is why, super duper busy now)

I think what is adding to my not doing well with all of this change is my birth control. I really think it makes me more anxious in stressful situations. I know it is doing a number on my hormones because i feel I might cry at the drop of a hat. I have been able to keep my composure though!!.

Oh some gooder news. I have my saline sonogram scheduled for friday june 15th. One thing down two to go.