They say time heals all wounds, but that doesn't mean the memory is gone. Being over 4 years since my first miscarriage I can attest that the pain has lessened, but the memory of those days and the words that were spoken are still fresh.

Maybe it's because I have suffered so much loss myself, but for some reason I am drawn to stories that break my heart. I want to help in some way, but I just don't know how. I feel it is my lifes calling to help women through the pain of infertility, miscarriage, infant death. I am just not sure the how, when or where. Sometimes I feel like I am so wrapped up in my own little world I don't know what is going on around me. I need to get out of myself and do something for someone else.

I have read Adrienne's blog about her son Noah for a long time. Her story is so sad but so uplifting at the same time. She has taken the pain of losing her son to do wonderful things for the world and for the kingdom of God.

I stumbled across Angie's blog about her daughter Audrey Caroline about a year ago. The strength and courage Angie had to carry Audrey to term knowing she would not survive. The beauty of the whole story just brings tears to my eyes.

And recently I started reading Heather's blog about her daughter Madeline a couple months ago after I heard of Maddie's unexpected passing. Her story breaks my heart. Her pain is so real and raw and she is not afraid to share it. She also loves to share stories and videos of Maddie. I love to watch the videos with Kai. He just smiles at Maddie, she was such a beautiful little girl.

And just now I stumbled onto this Caringbridge site about Kate. Kate is 5 and was diagnosed with a brain tumor just a few weeks ago. Her battle is just beginning and it will be long and hard. Her parents are fighting right along with her. They are crying out to God for the health and life of their daughter. My heart breaks for them. No parent should have to watch their child go through cancer.

This morning I found myself at youtube watching videos of Maddie when I noticed so many other "in memory" vidoes of babies and children. There really is so much loss and pain in this world. So many people having to say goodbye to children too early. I torture myself by watching these videos and feeling the raw emotions myself. My heart cries out for these families.

I know this post is pretty much a downer, and I guess that is where I am right now. There are just days when the grief and sadness take over. The memories of what I have lost flood over me and then I see that others have lost so much too. The world is so hard and so unfair. But it is in times like these that I have to remember how good God is . He loves us and cares for us. He hates all that we have to go through here on earth, but that is the price of free will I guess. I will continue to thank him for the lives of these children, all that they touched in such a short time. And I will continue to get on my knees and pray for the ones still fighting.